Sunday, 8 March 2009

The past, the present and the future..

There is a certain addiction we have, as human beings, of dwelling on the past, times when things were better, when they were much easier, and everything floated by as if you were an angel on a cloud.
But soon this image becomes fogged with reality, and the time when the past was the present is gone. Holding onto the past is something we all do, however sometimes I think to myself, how healthy is it to hold onto the past?
In a sense, it would be strange not to grasp at aspects of it, to forget your 13th, 16th, 21st birthday party would almost be considered a sin, the 21st probably more acceptable due to alcohol. However, how healthy is it to hold onto memories of past lovers and friends that you have either grown to hate through the inability to make the relationship work, or because of the new girlfriend/boyfriend they have who is a total cunt because of your huge amounts of jealousy. 
I think being nostalgic on relationships, and turning to them in a good light is a beautiful thing to be able to do. To be able to sit there with a friend and giggle about the funny times you had with people in the past is a gift not many of us possess. Many people have stuck to the unchangeable myth that everyone hates their ex's, but in a sense I think I admire mine. This is because of many different reasons, but I admire each one of them for putting up with me for that amount of time. I think the hardest thing about ex's is the real place they forever hold in your heart, which is something we all blame them for, when really, it's all our fault.
I think that to forget our past would be wrong as well, because we all learn from our mistakes. To make a mistake, is to learn another one of life's lessons. But if we got rid of the idea of time, and the idea that the past is the past, and the present is the present, there is no past, it's all just a part of us as a human, then in that sense, the 'past' is a part of us, so even if we wanted to forget we couldn't. It flows through us as if it was part of us.
I could over-obsess about the past, and dwell on it far too much, but there's a line, and I don't think I'm about to cross that anytime soon.

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